"The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself." ~Mark Twain
I've become a "woman of a certain age." I once thought that meant reaching a birthday women no longer admitted to. In my case, however, it's an age of appreciating where I've been, and recognizing - optimistically - that the journey is far from over.
The bywords of this stage in life seem to be health and fitness.
The bywords of this stage in life seem to be health and fitness.
Programs such as Dr. Oz and The Biggest Loser attract millions of television viewers; magazines and newspapers are full of information on the latest superfoods and weight-loss trends. It seems like everyone I know is talking about some aspect of wellness. This isn't a new cultural obsession; I remember my mom going to Weight Watchers when I was a teenager. What's different now compared to four decades ago (with the notable exceptions of infomercials still touting six-pack abs and dimple-free derrieres) is emphasis has shifted from outward appearance to nutrition and physical dexterity. For this woman of a certain age, that's an appreciated perspective shift.
I've ridden the weight roller coaster for decades. The peaks have grown higher, but so have the valleys. I put the stats in a table (okay, approximation of stats - my husband didn't even know this stuff!) which led to reflecting on my life status during each weight high and low.
I've ridden the weight roller coaster for decades. The peaks have grown higher, but so have the valleys. I put the stats in a table (okay, approximation of stats - my husband didn't even know this stuff!) which led to reflecting on my life status during each weight high and low.
My focus this time around has not been specifically on losing weight; dropping pounds has been a happy side effect of lifestyle changes. My real motivation is seeing the big 6-0 on the horizon, and fearing if I can't be my healthiest self now, my senior years could be riddled with avoidable health issues. Numbers on the scale or my pants size no longer has power over how I feel about myself. The facts are:
For now I'm happy to be feeling - and seeing! - the results of moving more and making better food choices. The best physical me now won't be the same as a few decades ago, but I'm fairly certain that 20 years from now, the current me will be looking pretty darned good.
- Looking good and feeling fit at age 48 was very different than it was at age 18. Good eating and exercise habits didn't turn the clock back 30 years then, and it won't now. I don't want to be 28 again, anyway.
- If I ever weigh under 130 again, it will be likely due to serious illness or loss of some body parts. Neither option is appealing. I'll choose to celebrate that a little softness over muscle helps fill out some wrinkles.
- The scale will eventually stop showing lower numbers. Healthy eating and daily exercise will help my body get to the weight it's intended to be. Trying to weigh less will be an endless battle, and I've got better things to do with my energy.
- It's really stupid to believe I will "never gain back the weight again." I might. Life happens.
For now I'm happy to be feeling - and seeing! - the results of moving more and making better food choices. The best physical me now won't be the same as a few decades ago, but I'm fairly certain that 20 years from now, the current me will be looking pretty darned good.
