Warning: The introspective mood continues.
For example, this week a childhood friend posted the announcement she is leaving Facebook. I had reconnected with her through FB; I'd been enjoying perusing her albums - which reveal her talent for photography - and getting updates on her family. As I read her message, I felt a sense of personal loss. Although not explicitly stated, I inferred her decision had to do with her values and, in part, where she was investing her time. I admire her bold move, but I also feel unsettled
The early change to Daylight Savings Time is another event tugging at my thoughts. In previous years it wasn't that big of a deal for me, but this year I feel a bit off-center. I'd been waking up around 6:30 a.m., when daylight brightened my bedroom. Suddenly I'm "oversleeping." An extra hour of light in the evening isn't helping. I nearly missed Jeopardy yesterday because it was still light at 7 p.m. Routines I apparently subliminally connect to light and dark are messed up.
Much of the country is still in the midst of March's lion-to-lamb transition. However, here the azaleas have already shed most of their spring blooms. During a weekend walk, I noticed foliage was greening, kids were playing in neighborhood streets, and tantalizing aromas of grilled meat wafted through the air. The combination evoked a sense of surreality; they are things I associate with summers in Michigan, where I grew up, not late winter. Ironically, the characteristics that attract northerners here by the planeload at this time of year are the same ones contributing to my general disquiet.
These things may not be as disconnected to each other as they first seemed. They are each connected to the concept of time - how it's used, how it passes - and are not things I control. Perhaps the latter is what bothers me. Or maybe I'm feeling challenged to scrutinize my own use of time, which I don't really want to do. I know what I'll find: time I can't get back that could have been better spent.
It's time to delete my FB game apps.